{real talk} How To Tell If a Man Is Gay, in 5 Easy Steps

Do you feel like your “gaydar” is broken? Do you have trouble telling whether a man is gay or straight? Here are 5 easy and surefire ways to tell if a man is gay!

5 Ways To Tell if a Man is Gay

1. Does he prefer romantic and sexual relationships with other men? If so, he is probably gay.

2. Is he good at cleaning the house? Is he neat and tidy? Or is his apartment a filthy mess? It doesn’t matter. This is not a good way to tell if he’s gay. Go back to #1.

3. Does he cook delicious, gourmet meals while wearing a saucy apron? Or is he hopeless in the kitchen? Cooking skills in no way indicate sexual preference, so answering these questions won’t help you. See #1.

4. What about fashion sense: would you describe him as “GQ” or “Dan from Roseanne?” Do his shoes and belt match? What about grooming and hygiene: is he clean and shaved or with a full bushy beard? Nope, that won’t clue you in either. Try answering #1 and see if that helps.

5. Does he act “flamboyant” and “sassy?” Does he use hilarious, zeitgeist-y jargon like a Project Runway reject? On that note, is he a big fan of Project Runway? Or does he like watching football? Baseball? The Simpsons? Star Trek? IT DOESN’T F***ING MATTER. SEE #1 ALREADY, and stop stereotyping gay (and straight) men.

Thanks to my dear friend Sasha for inspiring this post. 

image: David Goehring on flickr creative commons