American cheese, ham, crusty bread, all pressed in some 1950s machine. Heaven. I think it was only 2 dollars. Swig some cafe con leche along with it, and you’ve got a breakfast of champions. The place ain’t fancy and the people aren’t that nice, but that’s not what you’re after. There will be other tourists there, but plenty of locals too.

La Bombonera is at 259 Calle San Francisco in Old San Juan and open daily from 7:30 AM – 8 PM.

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Don’t fool yourself, Mexico City (DF to locals- which stands for “Distrito Federal) changes hotspots faster than NYC- with a population of 20+ million, there are sure to be a fair number of hipsters and trendsetters living and playing there. Here are some classic spots, as well as some joints du jour you should eat and drink at if you find yourself there.

One more note: cabs are cheap, but the Metro system can be fun too. The metro cars go surprisingly fast, considering they run on rubber tires instead of tracks. The fare will cost you mere pennies but you’ll probably reach your destination more quickly than in a car- and you’ll have a little more fun doing it. On to the list!

• El Cardenal- the best breakfast ever. Amazing fruit smoothie thingies and mouth-watering tamales. This is a nice place that folks go with their families.
• Cafe Tacuba- an old and famous favorite. Beware the machitos on the menu. That means bull penis!
• Xel Ha- the new hip tapas spot to hit.
• Los Danzantes- right on the Plaza de Coyoacan, they have been serving awesome Mexican fusion for quite a few years now.
• La Bipolar- if you are in Coyoacan and you are a starf***er go to Diego Luna’s kitschy hipster restaurant.
• Ligaya- If you’re young and hip you will be hanging out in Condesa or Roma, and someone will suggest you go to Ligaya for a meal. The space is intimate and modern with a surprising little indoor courtyard.
• Casa Merlos- Admittedly I have never been here but have been dying to. It is lauded throughout the land.

Para pasar el tiempo entre comiendo, tomando, y durmiendose… the 3 best DF activities, which also happen to be 3 of the best activities worldwide.

• Get to Xochimilco, which has canals still around from Aztec times. Hire a boat (lancha), buy beers or Cokes off a passing skiff, and pay a band to strap itself to your boat and keep you entertained.

• Head to the Arena Mexico for a real live lucha libre- the masked wrestling sensation that’s almost too ridiculous. Sit up front if you can.
• Drive an hour out of town to check out the pyramids at Teotihuacan. Climb to the top and take in the view. Feel free to pretend you are in pre-Columbian times and living in the largest New World city of your era.

Listings:

• El Cardenal: Avenida de las Palmas 215, Lomas de Chapultepec, DF
• Cafe Tacuba: Tacuba 28, Colonia Centro, DF
• Xel-Ha: Parral 78 Bis, Colonia Condesa, DF
• Los Danzantes: Plaza Jardin Centenario 12, Colonia Coyoacan, DF  {website}
• La Bipolar: Malitzin 155, Colonia Coyoacan, DF
• Ligaya: Nuevo Leon 68, Colonia Condesa, DF {website}
• Casa Merlos: Victoriano Zepeda 80, Observatorio, DF
• La Pata Negra: Tamaulipas 30, Colonia Condesa, DF
• La Bodega: Popocatepetl 25, Hipodromo, DF {website}
• Spanish Cultural Center:
• Hotel Condesa DF
• Hotel Habita
• W Hotel Mexico City

View Mexico City on Off The (Meat)Hook in a larger map

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Mexico City → Flights |  Hotels |  Cars |  watch fares

Immigration and border patrol seems to be at the top of every political conversation. At Parque Eco Alberto, you can go on a pretend ‘Night Border Crossing Experience.’ The parque is owned by the Hnahnu Indians in Hidalgo, about three hours from Mexico City. The $18, four-hour night hike starts with the Mexico National Anthem. Your ‘coyote’ guide, Pancho, pulls off his black ski mask while actors gather around to scare you senseless along the way. Run from border control agents; dodge hidden actors shooting (blanks) at you, and make your way through barbed-wire fences. Survivors are blindfolded, led across a rickety bridge, and then set free to run across the border to freedom!

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First up: the gorgeous colorful kaleidoscope that is the colonial town of Guanajuato. Guanajuato is one of my favorite places in Mexico, and as it’s centrally located, it’s easily reachable from many points.

This lovely burg in Central Mexico’s state of Leon was founded in the 1500s, and funded lavishly for hundreds of years by a massively prolific silver mine just outside of town. The town is built up two sides of a ravine, and the residents favor bright colors for their boxy houses, which are packed together on teeny-tiny streets. In fact, legend has it 2 young lovers who lived across from one another used to live on a street so narrow that they could kiss each other from their facing balconies.  For that reason, the street is famously known as Callejon del Beso- Kiss Alley. Auto traffic flows mainly through an incredible system of medieval-looking underground tunnels that were constructed in the early 1900s. The result is that traversing town, whether in a car or by foot, is a transporting experience.

Food Tour of Guanajuato, Mexico

Of course I bought this- handmade chocolate sold by an ancient man outside the Mercado Juarez. He said it was made by his 3 sons. Inside the paper, I found fragrant cakes of Mexican chocolate, rich with dark cocoa, cinnamon, and big crunchy granules of sugar. It cost about 30 cents for a stack of 5.

One morning, I spotted some guys hanging out by this old truck packed with hanging cow carcasses and a trash can near Mercado Embajadoras. Nice meat hook!

I love my Best Foods, but something about that giant hot jar of mayo made me think twice about that tasty-looking corn.

The signs on these delivery scooters for a Domino’s franchise have successfully managed to make me think of both explosions and lotion, neither of which is particularly tantalizing in relation to pizza.

Looking down into the food stalls and lunch counters in Mercado Juarez from the 2nd floor.

A fabulous torta de carnitas (pork sandwich) with spicy red and green sauces, for less than a buck each from one of those very stalls.

Obligatory Mexican market photo of a ginormous pile of dried chilies.

My brother-in-law loved this squash blossom/huitlacoche/homemade cheese concoction he got from a street vendor at the Pípila, but it was a bit too overpowering for me.

This is an official street sign, the likes of which normally point you to geographical or tourist locations- but this one is pointing out the different types of local food you can get at Mercado de Gavira.

Drinking is serious business in Mexico: for my money, you’ve gotta go with a shot of Herradura Reposado (for sipping, no shooting!) with sangrita (to chase each sip) and a Modelo Especial (in between.)

This guy was selling tamales from a bucket at 1 AM (35 cents for 2.) We got one because we were intrigued by “dulce” – sweet tamales. It was a tamale with pineapple goo inside. Not bad, but I’ll stick with savory. I should have tried acelgas (chard.)

We happened upon a minor league baseball game in an amazing stadium embedded right into the middle of town, and ate lots of salty roasted pistachios and pumpkin seeds, with cheap beers of course, while enjoying the action.

The stadium itself is nestled in a pocket of houses right in town, with the back walls comprised of rough-hewn rock.

Your choice for tickets: sun or shade. Guess which one is cheaper?

To visit Guanajuato: Del Bajio airport in Silao/Leon is about a 30 minute drive from Guanajuato. Mexicana, Aeromexico, Continental, American Eagle, and Delta all fly into Del Bajio from the U.S. The town is centrally located and can also be easily reached by bus from Mexico City, Guadalajara, San Miguel de Allende, Queretaro, and many other places.

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