It’s probably not technically accurate to call this tasty soybean dip “hummus” but you should think of it as a descriptive, evocative name, not a culturally accurate one. (I’m not alone in this – for example, they’re pretty conflicted about this, among other aspects of edamame hummus, over at The Delicious Life. But no matter what you want to call it, it turns out if you give soybeans a somewhat hummus-like treatment, you get a whole lotta tasty. Here’s my take on the meme.

I added mint leaves and various sesame products, because I thought it was too boring without. Some people think you should remove the thin outer covering from the soybeans before pureeing them. Those people a) care more about the smoothness of their dips than me, and b) are not as lazy as me. If that describes you, knock yourself out. But I would say it’s highly unnecessary and I like texture in my dip anyway. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Edamame Hummus

Ingredients:

• 1 small clove garlic
• 2 cups cooked, shelled soybeans
• 1/4 cup loosely packed mint leaves
• juice of 2 lemons
• 2 Tblsp sesame tahini
• 1 Tblsp sesame oil plus more for garnish
• salt to taste

Method:

• Put garlic in food processor and pulse to chop finely. Add soybeans, mint, 1/2 tsp salt, and  lemon juice and puree to roughly chop the soybeans.
• Add tahini, 1 Tblsp sesame oil, and 1/2 cup water and continue to puree until it reaches desired consistency. You might need to add more water. Taste and add salt if necessary.
• Remove to bowl. Make a well with a spoon and garnish with a small amount of sesame oil (not too much as it can be overwhelming.) Serve with pita or pita chips.

I have been really busy lately, but one of the bright spots of my recent days was making this cornbread and then eating it all.

Cornbread can be too sweet or too mealy or too dry or too boring, but this cornbread is none of those things. I’m guessing it’s largely because of the copious amounts of bacon and bacon grease that go into it, but there could be other reasons. I like it warm out of the oven or lightly toasted. With all the fat in it, even I don’t need to put butter on it… and that’s saying quite a lot since I like to put butter on EVERYTHING. But it’s not solely enhanced by the pig products- it’s rounded out with caramelized onions and a measure of parmesan cheese just for the heck of it. So swine up your cornbread- one bite and you will wonder why you have spent all these years eating stupid regular non-porked cornbread.

Props to my friend Rodney for the bones of the recipe, who wants to try this with pork sausage instead of bacon and turn it into stuffing, which makes me ask, great, what time should I be there for dinner, pal?

Swinetastic Cornbread

Ingredients:

• ½ lb. thick cut bacon or pancetta, cut in small squares
• 1 yellow onion, sliced thinly
• 1 cup flour
• 1 cup cornmeal
• 2/3 cup sugar
• 1 tblsp baking powder
• ½ tsp baking soda
• 1/4 tsp salt
• ¾ cup sour cream or plain yogurt
• ½ cup milk or buttermilk
• 1 egg
• ¼ cup bacon grease (liquid) + more for greasing the pan and cooking the onions
• ½ cup grated or shaved parmigiano

Method:

• Cook bacon over medium heat until brown and crispy. Remove to paper towels with slotted spoon and set aside.
• Pour out all but about 2 tsp of bacon grease and reserve for later. Turn heat to low and add onions. Season with salt and cook, stirring often, until onions are caramelized, about 20-30 minutes. Remove and set aside.
• Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Grease a loaf pan or square 9×9 pan with extra bacon grease.
• Mix together flour, cornmeal, sugar, baking powder and soda, salt, and parmesan in a bowl.
• In a separate bowl, mix sour cream or yogurt, buttermilk, and egg.
• Mix together dry and wet ingredients, being careful not to overmix. Add liquid bacon grease and stir to combine.
• Gently stir in cheese, bacon, and onions. Pour into prepared pan and bake 45 minutes to an hour, until a toothpick comes out clean.
• Serve warm or let cool and toast lightly before serving.

What is TotMac, you ask? Why it’s homemade Mac N Cheese topped with Tater Tots, of course. Behold: TotMac!

I cannot tell a lie: I did not come up with this concept. There’s a great little neighborhood restaurant here in SF called Q and they are known for topping their Mac with Tots. HOWEVER. While I have enjoyed Q’s Mac on several occasions, I have always felt that the Mac execution could be improved upon. Ergo, I Totted my own Mac, with diabolically delicious results.

So, here’s how it goes down: make some hella good homemade Mac N Cheese. You can really make it however you like it, as long as you PROMISE to make it hella good. Cook frozen tater tots according to their packaging. Cook your Mac N Cheese for 10 minutes less than you normally would. Cover top of hot Mac with hot Tots and cook for about 10 minutes. If you’re CRAZY LIKE ME which is to say LIKE A FOX  you can put crumbled crispy prosciutto or bacon on top of the Mac, but under the Tots.

So Tot your Mac today: it’s highly recommended for those who fancy the idea of double carbing your carbs while white trashing up your fancy Mac N Cheese!

A couple months back I posted about a condiment competition between me and my Dad. At the time, I made a black mustard, which I called Moutarde Le Bête Noire (”Black Beast Mustard”), and it was extremely pungent and spicy.

It turns out if you mellow this mustard in the fridge for about a week, it’s absolutely fantastic. Although it didn’t win the competition at the time, it’s now a family favorite. One of our newly learned tricks is to quickly saute green beans or asparagus and toss with this mustard before serving. It’s mellow, rich, and complex, and adored by mustard aficionados and skeptics alike.

You’ll need black garlic to get the full complement of layered flavor here- otherwise it will lack the depth. If you’re not familiar with black garlic, there’s more info in this post.

Moutarde Le Bête Noire

Makes 5-6 cups mustard.

Ingredients:

• 2 cups cabernet sauvignon
• 2 cups red wine vinegar
• 12 cloves black garlic, smashed
• 2 cups brown or black mustard seeds
• 2/3 cup yellow mustard seeds
• 15 black peppercorns
• 1 tsp salt
• 3 whole allspice
• 2 tsp molasses
• 2 T brown sugar

Method:

• Combine all ingredients and let sit for 24 hours at room temperature, loosely covered.
• Pour into food processor or blender and pulse until desired consistency.
• Put into jars and store in fridge for 5-7 days to mellow.
• If you plan to give all the mustard away and have it eaten within a couple of months, it will keep in the fridge. If you want to save it for the future, I recommend pressure canning it in jars.

This weekend I did something a little different… a Foodbuzz 24, 24, 24 event I’m calling Family Food Feud: Colossal Condiment Competiton! Read on for details, winners, dark horses, and recipes…

The background:

My Dad is super into making things and canning them for later- pickles, jams, tomatoes, syrups, you name it. Every year I try to add new things to our family’s home-canned repertoire, like lemon curd and onion relish. But in short, this came about because what started out as a father-daughter bonding moment over the idea of making homemade ketchup turned into a full-on condiment CHALLENGE! Suddenly it was a competition. We were one-upping each other with over-confident bluster about our innovative and sure-to-be tasty imagined flavor combinations. It was all out of control. And it was ON like DONKEY KONG.

This was to be a serious smackdown between me and my Dad. Having a relatively tactless group of friends and brutally honest  family members, we knew no one would play favorites with the judging. The results would stand. Thanks to Foodbuzz, who agreed to sponsor this familial food fight by featuring it in their 24, 24, 24 for July, our competition came to fruition.

The ingredients:

We ordered yellow and black mustard seeds and mustard powder from Penzeys. We used fruits and vegetables from my parents’ garden in Santa Rosa, and the wine we grow and produce on their land, whenever possible. Supplemental ingredients were purchased from the Santa Rosa and Alemany Farmers Markets.

The judging:

The judging was done by friends and family members who happened to be around. It was extremely unscientific and some participants may have had a lot of wine during and prior to the judging, which probably just made them even more honest. They ate the condiments on crackers, pretzels, pork loin, and whatever else was on the table, and discussed the pros and cons of each condiment until they came to roughly unanimous decisions.

The resources:

While all the recipes were strictly created for this competition, we turned to the trusty internets for guidance. Some pages that proved helpful (and some with pretty pictures) were these from A Pinch Of, Macheesmo, Kiss My Spatula, YumSugar, and Cake and Commerce. Thanks, Internets!

The miscellany:

We had the competition at my parents’ house in the Sonoma Wine Country. We did some preparation in advance (eg the soaking of the mustard seeds) and the bulk of the cooking and preparation over about 4-5 hours on Saturday.

We made vastly different amounts because we were inventing recipes. We canned the excess by storing it in sterilized jars and using a pressure canner after all of the judging was done. (For more info on safely canning food with a pressure canner, read this.)

>>>>>NOW ON TO THE EXCITING PART!!<<<<<

The entries:

We each agreed to make 2 mustards and 1 ketchup. I made a third bonus mustard because I felt like it, dammit! Here are the entries:

My entries in the top row. From left to right: Orange-Vanilla Bean Mustard; Moutarde Le Bête Noire, Margarita Mostaza, Kick-Ass Ketchup

Dad’s entries in the bottom row. From left to right: Molto Bene Mustard; Smoky Ketchup; Peach Moscato Mustard

The mustards:

For my mustards, I went with 3 very disparate styles. The first, orange-vanilla bean, was a smooth mustard made from mustard powder, honey, orange juice and zest, with seeds from a whole vanilla bean. It had a wonderful sweet and spicy balance but was waaaay too runny. It also sort of started discoloring in a highly unappealing fashion. The second, Le Bête Noire, was one of my favorites but not particularly well-loved by, well, anyone else. I used black mustard seeds, aged black garlic, molasses, and pinot noir for earthy notes and a rich dark brown color, but at the end of the day it was deemed to be a little boring. My third entry was Margarita Mostaza which utilized components of a margarita- I soaked yellow seeds in reposado tequila and combined them with honey, lemon, lime, chiles, and salt.

My Dad made 2 mustards, both of which were more complex in preparation than mine. For the Molto Bene mustard, he started by making a whole grain mustard, then incorporated sun-dried tomatoes and dried ground prosciutto (!). His Peach Moscato mustard was made in the style of a hollandaise, with egg yolks whisked in over a double boiler. It used sweet Moscato wine and a puree of dried peaches, using fresh peaches in his orchard that he dried in a food dehydrator.

WINNER: Peach Moscato Mustard

My Dad put a lot of thought and effort into this mustard and it was worth it. The Peach Moscato mustard was smooth and perfectly creamy, and could just as easily serve as a dip for a nugget or a spread on the most upscale of sandwiches. The peach notes were pronounced without being overwhelming and the sweet/spicy balance was pleasing to all.

RUNNER UP: tie between Margarita Mostaza and Molto Bene

While no one is totally sure what food to put the Margarita mustard on, everyone liked it. It REALLY tasted like a margarita, and soaking the seeds in tequila and adding a serrano chile gave it additional layers of heat. The Molto Bene mustard benefited heavily from the fact that it has salty prosciutto and oily dried tomatoes permeating it, giving it a richness and round Italian essence that would taste great on a sausage. Who but my Dad would think of making a meat mustard though?!?!

The ketchups:

We each made 1 ketchup. Dad made Smoky Ketchup, for which he grilled all of the vegetables on the BBQ before combining and cooking them down into a slightly chunky mixture. I made the Kick-Ass Ketchup, and opted for a slightly more traditional approach, punched up with sundried tomatoes and chipotle. I strained it through a chinois for a smoother texture.

WINNER: Kick-Ass Ketchup

Between you and me I thought my Dad’s concept was terrific and that his would win, but it turned out his ketchup was not as positively enhanced by all of the grilling as one might have expected, and tasted a little too much like BBQ sauce. It was also a bit too sweet. On the other hand, the Kick-Ass Ketchup had just the right amount of spice, sweetness, acidity, and brightness to make it interesting and balanced without having any one flavor dominate.

The conclusion:

Making your own condiments is fun because there are so many possible flavor combinations for you to experiment with! Even our least favorite entries tasted a heckuva lot better than anything you can buy in a store. Making your own fancy mustards, especially, is totally worth is from a cost-benefit perspective. A whole pound of mustard seeds from Penzeys, which would make enough mustard to last quite some time, cost about the same as a little bottle of whole-grain mustard ($4.60.)

One thing that is important to note is that on the first day, homemade mustard is extra spicy. It will mellow with age and taste a lot milder after 2-3 days in the fridge.

The ketchup requires more raw ingredients to yield a much smaller volume, but the taste difference has me convinced that I will probably continue making it from here on out. It’s also a lot better for you than store-bought ketchup, which is full of corn syrup and chemicals.

The recipes:

You didn’t really think I would tell you all about this and show tantalizing photos then not provide recipes, did you? I’ve included the winning ketchup and mustard recipes, as well as the 2 runner-up mustards. Enjoy!

Karen’s Kick-Ass Ketchup

makes about 3 cups ketchup.

Ingredients:

• 1 onion, roughly chopped
• 1 shallot, roughly chopped
• 2 cloves garlic, peeled and smashed
• 1 chipotle (I used canned chioptles, and rinsed the sauce off)
• 3 lbs fresh tomatoes, roughly chopped (skin and seeds are ok)
• 1 Tblsp salt
• 1/3 cup turbinado (raw) sugar
• 1 cup sundried tomatoes in oil, drained
• 1/2 tsp celery seeds
• 1/2 tsp allspice
• 2/3 cup red wine vinegar
• 1/4 cup white wine vinegar
• 1 Tblsp brown sugar

Method:

• In large nonstick saucepan, combine all ingredients except white wine vinegar and brown sugar. Cook over medium low heat about 45 minutes, stirring frequently.
• Puree in blender or food processor until smooth. Strain through a fine strainer.***
• Rinse pot and return strained mixture to pot. Add white wine vinegar and brown sugar. Taste and add salt if necessary.
• Cook over very low heat another 30-50 minutes, stirring frequently and making sure ketchup is not sticking to sides and bottom.
• Remove from heat and cool. Store in jars or tupperware.
• ***I like to save the stuff that’s left in the strainer and toss it with pasta for a quick, flavorful meal!

Mike’s Peach Moscato Mustard

makes about 2 cups mustard.

Ingredients:

• 3/4 cups dried peaches
• 1/2 bottle sweet moscato wine
• 1 1/4 cup mustard powder
• 1/2 cup white wine vinegar
• 2 Tblsp powdered sugar
• 1 tsp turmeric
• 6 fresh egg yolks
• salt to taste

Method:

• Put dried peaches in a blender or food processor with a splash of moscato. Puree until smooth.
• Pour peach puree, remaining moscato, mustard powder, vinegar, sugar, and turmeric into the top of a double boiler (or a metal bowl suspended over a pot of water) with a little salt, and mix with a whisk. The water in the bottom of the double boiler should not be touching the upper part and should just be brought to a simmer.
• Add yolks and whisk over double boiler until mustard thickens. Taste and add more salt or sugar as needed.
• Strain through a chinois, cheesecloth, or fine strainer.

Karenita’s Margarita Mostaza

makes about 2 cups mustard.

Ingredients:

• 1 dried serrano chile, roughly chopped, about half the seeds removed
• 1 cup good quality reposado tequila
• 2/3 cup rice vinegar
• 1 cup yellow mustard seeds
• 1/4 cup black mustard seeds
• 1/3 cup mustard powder
• 1/4 cup lemon juice
• 1/2 cup honey
• zest and juice of 1 large or 2 small limes
• 2 tsp salt

Method:

• Combine everything except lime zest, lime juice, and salt in a bowl. Let sit overnight, loosely covered.
• Pour into food processor or blender. Add lime and salt. Process until mustard reaches desired graininess.
• Store in the fridge in a jar with a lid or a tupperware container.

Mike’s Molto Bene Mustard

makes about 3 cups mustard.

Ingredients:

• 3 oz. prosciutto
• 1 cup yellow mustard seeds
• 3/4 cup brown mustard seeds
• 1 1/4 cup sauvignon blanc
• 1 1/4 cup white wine vinegar
• 1/4 cup sundried tomatoes in oil
• 1 1/2 tsp. brown sugar

Method:

• Combine mustard seeds, wine, and vinegar in a container and soak overnight.
• Heat oven to 300 degrees. Lay prosciutto in a single sheet. Cook until dry and crispy, about 45 minutes, checking often so it doesn’t burn. Let cool.
• In food processor or blender, puree cooled dried prosciutto and sundried tomatoes with a little of the oil from the tomatoes. Add mustard mixture and remaining ingredients and puree until desired consistency. If too thick add a little more wine or tomato oil.

I throw together a risotto dish quite often, but admittedly it’s a one of those things that can be hit or miss for me. Sometimes it rocks your world, and sometimes it’s merely OK. Last night I think I stumbled on the secret to great risotto: aged black garlic in the mix. When combined with that magical triumvirate of cheese, cream, and oil, you just can’t lose.

For those of you who don’t read food blogs all day long, you may not know what the hell I’m talking about. Aged black garlic is newish on the culinary scene, and is just that: whole heads of garlic that have been heat-aged, producing a soft black clove inside. It’s nothing like raw garlic. It’s sweet, salty, soy-saucey, and I’m inclined to think it’s like natural MSG- add it to anything and it makes you want to keep eating more and more. If you’re tempted to try it, you can buy black garlic online at Earthy Delights. I got a whole box and I’m totally hooked on the stuff,  so you’ll be seeing it appear in future recipes.

As to the risotto- let’s just say that my family is not the type to praise something unless it’s good. In fact, they’re downright tactless. But the unanimous decision on this risotto was that it was out of this world. Thank you, black garlic.

Risotto with Black Garlic and Oyster Mushrooms

serves 8 as a side dish.

Ingredients:

• 4 T olive oil, divided
• 1 lb. oyster mushrooms, roughly chopped
• 1 shallot, minced
• 2 cloves garlic, peeled and minced
• 2 cups arborio or carnaroli rice
• 1 cup dry white wine
• about 4 cups chicken or mushroom broth
• 4 cloves aged black garlic, minced
• 1/4 cup heavy cream
• 3/4 cups grated or shredded parmigiano
• salt and pepper

Method:

• Heat 2 Tblsp olive oil in a large saucepan. Add mushrooms, salt, and pepper, and cook over medium heat until browned and shrunken, about 15 minutes. Remove from pan and set aside.
• In the same pan, heat remaining oil over medium heat. Add shallot, garlic, and rice. Cook, stirring often, to soften the shallot and garlic and to toast the rice a bit.
• Add wine and lower heat a bit. Stir. When wine has almost evaporated add about 1 cup of broth and the chopped black garlic. Add salt and pepper.
• Continue cooking, stirring often, adding broth 1 cup at a time and letting it cook off. If rice is still not cooked and you run out of broth, you can start adding water in 1/2 cup increments.
• When rice is creamy but not mushy, with all liquid absorbed, turn off heat and stir in cream and cheese. Taste and add salt and pepper. Pour into serving bowl and top with mushrooms. Serve immediately.

On a recent trip to Vieques, Puerto Rico, we ate at a fantastic little restaurant called El Quenepo. I loved their grilled caesar salad and thought that while the dish was fresh in my mind, I’d try making a version at home. Grilling the romaine hearts adds a fantastic layer of smoky complexity that compliments the strong flavors of the dressing.

Vieques is a notoriously, unabashedly casual place, and El Quenepo is probably the “fanciest” restaurant on the whole island. I say that in quotes because, well, nothing on Vieques could remotely be referred to as fancy- we’re talking about a restaurant with a hand-painted sign and no glass in the window frames. Still, it’s an utterly charming place with a laid-back island aesthetic and an adventurous, sophisticated fusion menu. The owners are a young couple from Virginia who encourage local farmers on Vieques to grow food for use in the restaurant, which is a real treat in the Caribbean, where most folks don’t emphasize the importance of eating locally. If you find yourself in Vieques, I highly encourage you to head to the Malecón in Esperanza and give El Quenepo a try.

A few notes about the recipe:

1. This would work better on a BBQ grill, but alas, I don’t have one, so I used a grill pan, which worked just fine.
2. For the bread for the croutons, you can really use anything. I used sliced sourdough that had gone a bit stale.
3. If you’re uncomfortable using a raw egg yolk, you can leave it out.
4. If you prefer your caesar with anchovies, you can add 3 to the dressing and/or you can place them on top of the salad when you plate it!

Grilled Caesar Salad

serves 2 as a main course; 4 as a side.

Ingredients:

• 1-2 slices bread
• garlic salt to taste
• 3/4 cup grated parmigiano or pecorino cheese
• juice of 1 lemon
• 1 clove garlic, peeled
• 1 raw egg yolk
• 1/4 cup good quality extra virgin olive oil
• 2 Tblsp slivered almonds
• salt and pepper
• 2 small heads of romaine
• extra olive oil for grilling and toasting

Method:

• Make the croutons: Cut bread into 1/2 inch cubes. Heat a generous amount of olive oil in a non-stick saute pan (at least a couple tablespoons). Add bread cubes and a healthy sprinkle of garlic salt to the oil. The bread will quickly soak up the oil. Add more as needed (don’t be afraid you’re adding too much because in this case there’s practically no such thing.) Taste and add more garlic salt as necessary. Cook bread cubes until toasty on all sides, flipping often. Remove to bowl and set aside.
• Make the dressing: Put cheese, lemon juice, garlic, yolk, oil, almonds, and salt and pepper in a food processor or blender. Blend until thick and creamy, scraping down sides in between. Set aside.
• Grill the romaine: Cut the romaine lengthwise, leaving the hard connector part on the bottom intact (you’ll remove it later.) Heat a grill or grill pan to very very hot. Brush the cut side of the romaine with olive oil and sprinkle with coarse salt and pepper. Press the cut side onto the grill or pan, checking every 5-10 seconds (it will cook very quickly.) You don’t want the lettuce to wilt too much, just to get the cut side smoky and grilled.
• Assembly: Place romaine on plate and sprinkle croutons around. Drizzle dressing over.

The other night, I made Mac and Cheese with no recipe and had an epiphany- you don’t need a recipe to make Mac and Cheese. (I know, that’s not a particularly brilliant flash based on the context.) While there are lots of great recipes out there (I particularly favor this one) this is a dish that is perfectly suited to experimentation and variation. As long as you have the basic proportions and method down, you can go wild with this!

To make a 9×13 pan of tasty M&C, the proportions you need are essentially 1 pound of pasta, 2-3 cups of roux, 2-4 cups of cheese, and 1-2 cups of topping. Once you have this basic setup, you can play around with flavor combinations to your heart’s content.

About the elements:

• THE PASTA: Whatever shape you like should do fine. I have never tried with a long noodle like spaghetti or fettucine but if you’re feeling adventurous I’m sure it won’t kill you.
• THE ROUX: The base of the gooey cheesy part is a white sauce or roux. To make a roux you need 1 Tablespoon butter to 1 Tablespoon flour to 1 cup milk. For 2-3 cups double or triple those amounts. Melt the butter and add flour, whisking. Cook until pasty. Add milk, salt, and pepper, and continue whisking as you bring to a boil. Cook until thick.
• THE CHEESE: You can use one type of cheese or a mixture. If you’re using a mild cheese like a medium cheddar, you might want to punch it up with a parmigiano or a brie. On the other hand, if Gorgonzola’s your game, you may want to cut the pungency with a more demure Jack.
• THE TOPPING: The basis of the topping is generally bread crumbs mixed with a bit of melted butter. I like to add grated parmigiano and often, a pork product (crispy bacon pieces or prosciutto spring to mind.) Toasted nuts would be interesting, especially depending on your cheese choice (blue cheese mac with pecan topping, anyone?) You can make a couple pieces of toast in the toaster and put them in the food processor to get 1-2 cups of crumbs. Mix with a few tablespoons of melted butter, salt, pepper, and other accoutrements as desired. Or, you could skip the topping altogether and go for a strictly creamy casserole.
• THE EXTRAS: If you’re inspired to mix in a handful of sun-dried tomatoes, some chopped steamed broccoli, a swirl of pesto, a fistful of browned sausage, or anything else tasty you can imagine, then don’t let me stop you! You should also feel free to jazz up your roux by starting it with sautéed shallots, a couple chopped chipotles, some fresh herbs, or… the possibilities are endless.

The Method:
Heat oven to 350.

• Cook the pasta to al dente and drain.
• Make the roux and stir the cheese in it.
• Combine the cheesy roux and the cooked pasta well and pour into a buttered 9×13 glass pan.
• Distribute topping over Mac and Cheese and bake for about 20 minutes, until cheese bubbles up.
• Serve immediately.

I get tired of plain ol’ mashed potatoes, so I’m always looking for ways to change it up. I like to combine cauliflower and potatoes in this mash for the added nutrition benefits and the great flavor combination. After mashing the two together, I gratinee them in the broiler with freshly grated parmigiano-reggiano for a taste and texture treat.

Potato Cauliflower Gratin

serves 8 as a side dish.

Ingredients:

• 3 lbs yukon gold potatoes, peeled and quartered
• trimmed florets from 1 head cauliflower
• 1/2 cup butter, cut in chunks
• 4 oz. cream cheese, cut in chunks
• about 1/2 cup milk
• 3/4 cup grated parmigiano
• salt and pepper

Method:

• Bring large pot of salted water to a boil. Add potatoes and cook 15 minutes.
• Add cauliflower and cook an additional 5-10 minutes, until potatoes and cauliflower are soft and cooked through.
• Drain and return to pot. Add butter and mash. Add cream cheese and continue mashing. Add milk a bit at a time and continue mashing to desired consistency (I like this combo a little lumpy but feel free to go smooth with it.)
• Add salt and pepper to taste.
• Spread mixture out into 9×13 or other ovenproof pan. Sprinkle cheese over top.
• Broil a couple of minutes until cheese is browned.

The other night I made a big batch of carnitas for some family and friends. Of course, you have to have beans on the side, and no one makes better Mexican beans than my brother-in-law Steve-O. He was kind enough to walk me through the process. Since then I have adapted and changed them to my liking.

There are some reasons these taste better than regular beans. One reason is the beer. Another is the method of adding a whole bunch of liquid and then cooking the s*** out of them so all the liquid reduces back into the beans to flavor them.

There is no picture because you know what it’s impossible to take a good picture of? Smooshed up refried beans. I even thought of pulling a picture off of some other website but they were all unattractive too. Go ahead. Do a search. You’ll see. Plus I think it’s safe to assume that you all know what beans look like already.

UPDATE: I was wrong! I added a pretty good picture of beans that I took yesterday.

Steve-O’s Beer Beans

Ingredients:

• 2 T lard or vegetable oil
• 1/2 large onion or 1 small onion, chopped
• 2 cloves garlic, chopped
• 3 cans beans (pinto or black, or a combo)
• 1 can or bottle of beer- the yeasty ones are good, or use Mexican beer since you’ll probably be drinking it with your meal anyway
• 1 can chicken broth
• 1 or 2 envelopes of Caldo de Pollo, or some chicken broth concentrate (they have a new product at Whole Foods called “savory choice liquid concentrate chicken stock” that is my favorite. Steve uses the Caldo de Pollo from the Mexican foods aisle. You can use bouillion cubes if you must.)
• salt and pepper to taste

Method:

• In a large saucepan (preferably nonstick), heat the lard or oil over medium high heat. Add the onions and garlic and cook over medium heat until soft and aromatic.
• Add the beans with their liquid and stir. Cook for about 5 minutes, stirring. With a potato masher, smash up about half the beans.
• Add the beer, chicken broth, and Caldo de Pollo to the mixture. It should be pretty liquidy.
• Cook over medium low heat, stirring and scraping the sides, until the liquid has reduced and the beans are the consistency of refried beans.
• Taste and add salt and pepper and/or more Caldo de Pollo if necessary and cook, stirring, until deliciousness ensues.
• Go ahead, try and take an attractive picture. YOU CAN’T.
• These will keep for a couple of days in the fridge and can be made ahead.
• To make this vegetarian/vegan, substitute vegetable broth or mushroom broth for the chicken broth and caldo de pollo.